Life and Death

My stomach turns. It's the result of a mixture of excitement and uncertainty. In a moment of distraction and mild relief, I admire the shiny hardwood floors and dim lighting, I affirm once again that this is the best coffee shop in westwood. As I peruse the menu, I look accross as if I could somehow guess what Paula and Amit were pondering. I opt for Jasmine tea-light, daniel-fast approved, and comforting. The waitress takes our orders and akwardly our discussion begins.

Amit was a first year student that Paula and I randomly met through a series of strange occurences that can only be described as God ordained. At the end of our last meeting we had swapted numbers and had agreed to meet for a spiritual discussion.

Seeker bible studies, spritual discussions, GIGs etc., are strangely a familiar and comfortable setting for me. Coming into this meeting with Amit, God was showing me something new. An hour before the meeting, I was griped with the reality of life and death.

It is common for people to say they want to be doctors because they want to save lives, I say I want to share my faith because I want to save souls. This past week God's been hitting me with the spiritual reality of what we do and honestly sometimes I wanna run away from any responsibility God has entrusted to me. Evangelism can be this emotional rollercoaster for me. You pray for people, hope for them and share you life with them, but at the end of the day it's only the mercy of God that can bring them to that understanding of Jesus. To see someone come so close to touching Jesus, but turn their backs and walk away in fear or doubt, can be the most disturbing and troubling thing for me that is hard to shake at times.

Amit is a guy who admits to seeing signs from Jesus, but cannot put aside his own philosophy and rationale to take a step of faith. While sitting in that coffee shop for two hours, i knew i wasn't having a spiritual discussion, but God spoke to me that I was warring for a man's soul. In the midst of muffins and tea and students studying rigorously, we were trying to save a man's life. I hate thinking of it like that someitmes because pressure and responsibility of it can get to me even knowing that it's not in my hands. At the end of the night Paula handed him a track because he wanted to "try" christianity to see if it was real.

So much of the battle is fought on our knees and without our witness. Paula receives a call a few days later from the guy. He tells her that he followed the 4 steps listed in the track and afterwards turned to look in the mirror. Instead of seeing just himself, he sees Jesus standing before him. He is startled and overwhelmed. His logic and rationale cannot explain what he saw and in fact contradicts the very assertion of Jesus' divinity. There is a statistic that shows that 30% of Muslims convert by seeing Jesus showing himself to them in a vision or dream. Jesus is undeniable.